Deflated, Lopsided, and Flat

Blogger world, I think about you often. Very often. But I'm just too lazy to get on the computer and start writing. You know, these posts take me a really long time to draft. So much has been going on since the last update. I have a visit with my plastic surgeon today to deflate my right side, the non-cancerous side. Why you ask? Let's rewind a bit.

Since my last update, I was fully expanded on both sides. Then a week later, I had to deflate my left side to prepare for radiation. Now that was quite an experience. I was hooked up to a tube that led to a sucking machine on the wall. The machine was connected to a huge measuring cup. When the machine was turned on, the saline was sucked out of the expander and into the cup. The whole process took about 30 minutes and a total of almost 400 cc's was extracted. The end result was scary. I thought that my extra skin would just sag, but it didn't. My left foob (fake boob) was left to resemble a crater, with the outer edges being the expander. It isn't pretty. Now I'm completely lopsided and I have to stuff my bra to be somewhat even.

Fast forward to yesterday. I had my CT planning appointment, which is designed to set me up for radiation. Basically, it's a CAT scan of my chest wall to determine where the rays are going to hit each time I go for radiation. I would also leave with red marks and dots on my chest so they know where to put my tattoos at the next appointment. After I got the scan, I was told that my right side was interfering with the angle of the beams. Which means I have to deflate it. Seriously? Luckily, I already had a scheduled appointment with my plastic surgeon today that I didn't originally need, and they had a cancellation this afternoon for another CT planning. So I'm back on schedule. But still, seriously? You might be wondering, like Tony was, what happens if someone had a real boob that got in the way? Well, real boobs are squishy and when one lies down, they fall to the sides. A foob with expanders in them stays in the same exact position whether one is standing or lying down. They are hard as a rock and they don't move at all. I'm sure my plastic surgeon will be less than enthused about this dilemma, but I have no other options. On the brighter side, I don't have to stuff my bra anymore. Equally flat on both sides.

I've been on the fence about my hair lately. It's getting a little out of control, especially around the ears. When I wake up in the morning, it is a lot out of control. There are cowlicks everywhere. What should I do??? I'm so scared to get my first post chemo haircut. It still seems so short. I also want to color it something fun to fool people that I actually want my hair to look like this. As if it was cut short on purpose. Charlize Theron style. You know, the artsy type that I am totally NOT.